My Monday Entry

Please excuse my grammar and spelling. Am writing this whilst a bit drunk. Was at Devils just now. Celebrating Daniel’s (Karan’s bf) birthday. It’s been such a long time since I last went clubbing. (Especially on a Monday!) Had this girl (a friend’s friend) who came up to talk to me. She asked me for my name. I instantly said: “I’m gay.” Haha, so fun. You should have seen her reaction! First time I told a girl this. It’s not that I’m really gay (not that there’s anything wrong with that), but I just didn’t feel like chatting up another girl. Then I started to send unnecessary messages. Sorry yah? I know that was really redundant and uncalled for.

Was working at Expo last Sunday. Was quite happy as I donated to the SPCA tin-can. These animals really deserve more than being ill-treated. They have feelings too, you know? I shan’t name the event but I felt the organizers were really ill-planned and insensitive. They had this VIP room for some function. Knowing that there were disabled people attending, they should have provided for their needs. A simple ramp would have been so appropriate! I saw the poor guys struggling to get into the room.

To make things worst, I fell down after dinner!!! You know the wires going round my floor in the bedroom? I tripped and flew into my living room! The funny thing is that I was holding to my dinner plate as I fell. And it was still in my hand after I landed. The only thing is that the residual food in the plate spilled all over the floor. I landed so hard on my elbow it really hurts now. Ouch!

Really struggling to write now as my head is seriously spinning. Need to crash real soon. Anyway, just want to say: “Thanks for taking my breath away.” I’m so glad I got to meet you in this Life. Even if I could turn back time, I’d still choose to have met you. Take care meanwhile.

Wedding Bells!!!

Enjoyed my time at the SMC chalet last night. Had even won myself a multi-purpose toolkit! The highlight was of course something bigger.

My sincere congratulations to Andy aka Remus and Evelyn aka Ravageress to their new found life! It was such a touching moment. When Andy came up to stage, everyone thought he was going to introduce his company product. Suddenly he requested his girlfriend (Evelyn) to come up, got down on his knees and proposed to her!

My tears almost flowed out. I introduced Evelyn to Andy barely half a year ago and now, they are going to tie the knot already! I don’t care, better give me the VIP table at the banquet I tell you. I’m just so very excited for them and their new journey together in life. I wish you both the best in your marriage and make sure you “factory” a few chubby kids for us to play with yah?

I wonder how I’m going to propose to my future girlfriend. Hmm…I have to be more dramatic and creative than Andy. After all, Esmond’s a die-hard romantic when it comes to these things.

Not going to write too much tonight as I’ve to work tomorrow. : ( Have to be at the Expo at 9 am in the morning. Might not be sleeping tonight for I know myself. If I go to dreamland now, I’d probably end up oversleeping. Just plan to catch up on some serial VCDs instead.

A special thanks to Bubu for reading my stuff once in awhile. That itself makes me a happier person already. The SMS really made my night perfect and complete. Really appreciate it!

Exams, Exams.

Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed.
Proverbs 16:3

Study smart yah?

Wow! This gal is so freaking enlightening!

Was reading a blog I randomly entered. This gal wrote something which is so freaking enlightening!

little somethin i wrote...
the irony of love
The greatest irony of love;
loving the right person at the wrong time,
having the wrong person when the time is right
and finding out you love someone right after
that person walks out of your life...

and sometimes, you think you''re already over a person,
but when you see them smile at you,
you''ll suddenly realize that you''re just pretending
to be over them just to ease the pain of knowing that
they will never be yours again...

for some, they think that letting go is one way
of expressing how much they love that person...
in my opinion, some are afraid to see the one they love
being held by someone else...

most relationships tend to fail not because
the absence of love. love is always present.
it''s just that one was being loved too much and
the other was being loved too little...

as we all know that the heart is the center of the body
but it beats on the left. maybe that''s the reason
why the heart is not always right...

most often we fall in love with the person we think we love
but to only discover that for them we are just for passing time.
while the one who truly
loves us remains either a friend or a stranger...

so here''s a piece of advice;
let go when you''re hurting too much.
give up when love isn''t enough.
and move on when things are not like before...
For sure there is someone out there
WHO WiLL LOVE YOU EVEN MORE...

Source:
posted by retroglam at: 5/8/2005 9:00:00 PM - 23989
on http://retroglam.blogster.com/blogApp/?u=retroglam&

Especially the part about the heart being on the left thus it's not always "right". I don't know if I can agree. I think this varies from person to person though.

Walking

Nope, this is not a Johnnie Walker advert. In a way, it describes me pretty well. I like to take my time. Sitting by myself at the cafe, by the beach, et cetera.

"There are some good things to be said about walking. Not many, but some. Walking takes longer, for example, than any other known form of locomotion except crawling. Thus it stretches time and prolongs life. Life is already too short to waste on speed. I have a friend who’s always in a hurry; he never gets anywhere. Walking makes the world much bigger and thus more interesting. You have time to observe the details. The utopian technologists foresee a future for us in which distance is annihilated... To be everywhere at once is to be nowhere forever, if you ask me."
--Edward Abbey from "Walking" in The Journey Home

“Eagles of the Bay” by Esmond Ng © copyright 26/05/05

I’m so happy today! Guess why? I saw my Eagles in play! Was by the Merlion again for 3 odd hours. And from nowhere, out it came!

Hmm….why does the above sound so poetic? Haha. Anyways, I was doing my work there and sipping on my take-away cappuccino. I sat on the lion’s right, first row of steps. Weather was just fantastic this late afternoon. A bit too many tourist though. Then suddenly it happened, I saw my eagle come out to play! (Ref “Time of bridge” Tuesday, March 29, 2005. Ref "The different same old bridge" Wednesday, May 18, 2005.)

I was overjoyed when I saw it! I presume there’s not many around so it must be the same one. Five minutes later, it flew out again. This time a little one was chasing her around!!! I guess that really made my day! Wohoo!

For Bubu,

“Eagles of the Bay” by Esmond Ng © copyright 26/05/05
==================================================

Many times I’ve come and disappointed left.
Many tries for familiar sights to find; refresh.
Yet they seem to elude me with each and every visit,
By the bay, which for me have come to like.

Like may be too light a word used,
Heavy, it should be love the place I do.
Memories I hold dear survive at this bay,
And new paintings, pictures see I each stay.

Today must lucky have been my day,
Wait’d and our Eagle appear’d in soaring height.
Like Cupid’s arrow that dart’d across ye clear blue sky,
So too it was there, that His arrow shot me;
Making me Love’s blind.

That must have been all you’d say.
Elated I be this very day.
However just when all couldn’t be more bright,
Out came a little Eagle chasing His mother’s flight.

Oh how much glee they brought to me,
This day I regret not, myself by this sea.
For I know sometimes Thee doeth the same as me,
Try perhaps too, spot them and thinks’t of me.

Wee Hour Blues

Ever felt that you just can’t get to sleep? Well, that’s a frequent occurrence to me. In fact, I can’t get to bed most of my days. I don’t remember a night that I actually managed getting to my lala land before 4am for the past month and a half already.

Sometimes I get so caught up in my own little world, I fail to see things around me. When I can’t get to sleep, I would often drive out and “tour” places that were significant in my life. It’s just me to hold dear, memories that I really cherish. You can’t imagine how many times I’ve been to these places just to relive or get adsorbed into my “moments”. (Ref. Your Moments – 911 September 11, 2004)

I was walking towards the infamous “Durian” last evening when I saw Ricky and Hamster at the SIC coffee shop. Well, I waved and they reciprocated. However, I sense that they didn’t really like to see me. I’m not perturbed at all by their feigning smiles. After all, they are entitled to their own opinions. And they ain’t significant enough to me to bother me. Each and every time when I’m at my bridge, I see something different. It’s nice to know that this bridge is special to so many others too. I’ve tried sitting on every bench to figure out which one I was really on when I first fell in love with that place. I sort of have an idea but can’t be absolutely sure.

I spend an extra hour getting home whenever I choose to visit my bridge after work. However, that doesn’t get to me. When I’m at my bridge, it just brings me so much peace and I always leave happy. Don’t know if you feel the same when you leave that area but it sure works for me! That’s probably all my thoughts at this moment. Sleep early yah? Goodnight and take care.

Something is wrong! Anyone else feel it?

I can’t help but feel this way. Call it intuition or even over-sensitivity, but I just can’t stop thinking that something is wrong somewhere! It’s been like this for the past couple of days. And it’s making me so edgy. Like something serious has happened to someone close to me. Really can’t put my finger on it. I pray that God watches over all, especially my friends and close ones. If you feel that I’m talking about you, please confide in me. I might not be able to help, but I’ll definitely be here for you. Please.

I thAnk u for wAd u R t0 Mi, aNd tHis spEciaLly foR Ya :

Got this from someone's testimonial in friendster. The person who sent it really appreciated her friend. You can tell by the testimonials that she left. Found it a really nice and complete way to describe "friendships".

“Friendships come n friendships go,
Some r real n some are jus for show.
The friendship between us,
Is no mad fuss.
We've had our differences,
I learnt n let go.
I'm glad I did cause now I know.
Friends r there through thick n thin,
To make u happy, smile n grin.
They r there to stick up for u when
others r there to hurt,
They wont disappoint u behind your
back or talk any dirt.
Friends r there to brighten the days
that seem so rough,
They r there to share happiness when
things r no longer tough.
They r there to talk about guys u like
n dont,
And they wont go after a man u like-
never will n wont.
A friend is someone special u can
confide in n trust,
Everyone needs people like this in
their life,
as it’s a definite must.
A friend is someone u can talk to each
n every day,
And that U can believe in evarithin
they say.
I'm glad to have know someone, who is
all of these and more to,
And Well yeah...of course tt is U!"
by Ashley Williams

“Lavender Tales” by Esmond Ng 24/05/05 © copyright

For Bubu,

“Lavender Tales” by Esmond Ng 24/05/05 © copyright
================================================

Lavender, color of pale violet;
Pallid my checks without sight of thee.
Yet ye color of radiance beams,
On thy face is what long I to see.

Wildly commonly cultivat’d,
So wild my bushes burn for thee.
Tardily the bush fires my heart in,
Eats up single every ounce of me.

Its oil produce from which,
Makes luscious what perfumes need.
With each squeeze of the purple dream,
Comes each true feeling felt for thee.

Lavandula, fragrant really to me,
Not because of smells to flowers sweet;
But for meanings within thee thou has to agree,
That my Love, you equal as to it.

“Everyday Valentines” by Esmond Ng 18/05/05 © copyright

For Bubu,

“Everyday Valentines” by Esmond Ng 18/05/05 © copyright
=====================================================

I believe in Valentines,
Fact be that everyday should as such.
When Lovers’ hearts each meet,
Words redundant they become;
For Love is ye language that is needs.

Search I have for all my beating’s eternity,
Finally saw ye girl of it’s burning beseech.
That to the one and only such words I cannot repeat,
For everyday valentines,
Was only meant for Thee.

“Paint my memories” by Esmond Ng © copyright 25/05/05

For "Ms Crazily",

I'm truly sorry. I'm glad in a way we didn't even have a start. You deserve to find what you are looking for. You are right, I'm not worth it. Have a good NY trip.

I think I owe you at least one decent poem; compared to the rubbish rap I was trying to dish out the other night. Everything I need to tell you is inside.

“Paint my memories” by Esmond Ng © copyright 25/05/05
===================================================

I know Sorry is a word redundant,
When you have set out to eradicate me.
I know my explanations mean nothing,
For a verdict like a judge did pass me.

The reason for end is not as important as the ending,
This finale is not at all beautiful like stories seem.
But it may be best this way an end to all these,
For I realize myself too that anything to you I can’t promise.

I did enjoy your company, I really did.
Everything a memory I would still want to cherish.
Never did intend to use thee lik’d thee had deem’d me,
But it’s really not crucial the reasoning already.

For know myself more through knowing thee,
That in my heart someone else is still within me.
“Paint my memories” she did really,
A painting with varnish and medium to last for centuries.

Lest it be less use to say it,
It be best still the word to put it.
Thou do deserve someone better, someone that can give;
Sorry, that for you one is not me.

“The different same old bridge” by Esmond Ng 18/05/05 © copyright

Was at the Esplanade the whole afternoon and evening on Tuesday. It was drizzling and thus the dark picture. Such a memorable bridge for me, yet it seems the bridge so different now.


The "Differing Poles" 

Ref. “Time of bridge” Tuesday, March 29, 2005.

“The different same old bridge” by Esmond Ng 18/05/05 © copyright
==============================================================

Walk’d back to the all so familiar bridge.
Today it seems gloomy, might may drizzle rain due.
Stopp’d and sat on the same damp seat,
Today it really be different, the same old bridge.

The entire arvo I did spend by the bay,
Waiting for sights so well I knew.
But never did my eagle appear,
Nor my differing poles look pretty still.

People that jostl’d, travelers fearless of ye heaven’s tears.
Flashes that capture memories, all were in use.
Even a newly wed, in angelic whites brave’d;
The rain, which fell on me only feel.

Time on bridge which for we still’d;
Had left my side like which you did too.
Time, no longer a friend on ye lovely bridge.
For grey turned to darks’t and day to night’s way gave.
Nay, the different same old bridge did not stand still.

The Newly Weds' "Time of Bridge"

Ref. “Time of bridge” Tuesday, March 29, 2005.
Ref. "The different same old bridge" Wednesday, May 18, 2005.

The newly weds from the previous post. Wishing you a happily bliss “Ever-After”. It's their moment indeed. Their moment in "Time of Bridge".


The Newly Weds' "Time of Bridge" 

“My Diary” by Esmond Ng © copyright 17/05/05

“My Diary” by Esmond Ng © copyright 17/05/05
===========================================

I have a diary.
Which I write of things I can’t express here.
My inner most thoughts and feelings I unreservedly explicit.
Of which many are glum and melancholy.

I have a diary.
It be where my solace is.
For no other can relate to me; the way it can, truly.
Experiences, my journal; my life story.

If Heaven so decree and unkind be,
Let me make my final entry.
Then let the world be made known,
That this be my best work yet.

For the essence of my diary,
Is really what my Life means.
That no word in existence more appropriate,
Describe what Pain be.

So is this end of road for me?
If so really, pray do read my diary.

“What is Love?” By Esmond Ng © copyright 16/05/05

Was inspired to write this through my friend’s wedding earlier this year. I remember that a big group of us were invited to the dinner. Being the “official” group, we actually made his life very difficult. The emcee, who was also one of us decided to bombard him with a host of obstacles and questions before he can reach the stage to cut the cake.

Of the questions, there was one that struck me particularly. “How much do you love your wife?” After some pondering, he said: “Deeper than the ocean, wider than the sea.” So I asked myself. “If I were asked the very same question, what would my answer be?”

For Bubu,

“What is Love?” By Esmond Ng © copyright 16/05/05
=================================================

On my accustom’d bed laid I, grimly darks’t only moonshine through curtain slits;
My mind wonders’t, ponders and travels far within.
Of the meagre light shone, cast dainty a shadow on my wall facing.
Could this be my shadow? The shadow which of me speaks.

Thus called I out to him. “What be Love? My dear man, please forward me.”
“What be Love to you do you deem?”

“Is all talk about oceans deep and mountains steep that true Love sits?”
“Or rather the eye of Love’s first sight; a feeling from within?”
“Maybe, even a warm fuzzy heat that burns like fire uncontroll’d?”
“At the very least, it must be some form of comfort, familiarity and ease?”

Then my shadow spoke: “What be it really to you, Love?”
“The most important person and thing to you think of.”

As I laid, close my eyes and a tear roll’d it’s way out.
For at that tear’d instance knew I, what I’d say if asked.
“How much you, do Love me?”
My answer be: “More than myself deep.”

I Can Love You Like That

Found myself humming to the words of this song earlier today. It’s from way back, but I really love the lyrics. In some strange unexplainable way, this song seems written specifically for me! Haha. For those who don’t know Esmond that well yet, I’m really a very dreamer type of person when it comes to relationships.

Well, some of you may already have found your “perfect” partner already. Good on ya mate! Just make sure you cherish and love them with every damn thing you’ve got! For they don’t really appear before you every other day.

I Can Love You Like That
========================
All-4-1
from "And The Music Speaks"
(Steve Diamond/Maribeth Derry/Jennifer Kimball)

They read you Cinderella
You hoped it would come true
That one day your Prince Charming
Would come rescue you
You like romantic movies
You never will forget
The way you felt when Romeo kissed Juliet
All this time that you've been waiting
You don't have to wait no more

I can love you like that
I would make you my world
Move Heaven and Earth if you were my girl
I will give you my heart
Be all that you need
Show you you're everything that's precious to me
If you give me a chance
I can love you like that

I never make a promise I don't intend to keep
So when I say forever, forever's what I mean
I'm no Casanova but I swear this much is true
I'll be holdin' nothin' back when it comes to you
You dream of love that's everlasting
Well baby open up your eyes

You want tenderness-I got tenderness
And I see through to the heart of you
If you want a man who understands
You don't have to look very far

The Shattered Vase

For Bubu,

Many people would regard one as imperfect even though it has been pieced back. Most of them would just throw it away and buy a new one. You’d probably be able to see the cracks visibly. Or even have fragments in-between missing.

Well, I have never broken one. However, I have damaged things precious to me before. I still remember vividly when I was just 13. My favourite grandma brought me something that I have always longed for. A skateboard! I clearly recall that my parents were dead against it and were so very adamant about it. Guess what? My grandma bought it for me and secretly “smuggled” it to my place! Kind of cool for a grandma eh?

Just to digress a bit, she’s longer with us. Nevertheless, I still miss her a lot and think of her every now and then. I just regret not being a filial grandson and never ever getting to tell her how much I really love her. One day, she just left us all suddenly. I know she’s happy with God now. I love you, granny.

Just last Christmas, I heard the DJ on Class 95FM asking the listeners which were their most memorable Christmas. I immediately wrote in my dedication for my granny.

“Every Christmas is just as memorable and special to me. The reason being that my granny’s birthday is on Christmas. Every year, I regret not being able to tell her how much I really love her. Thus every Christmas, I am reminded to tell all those that matter to me how much I really appreciate and cherish them.”

Didn’t know if my dedication was read out but I’m sure my granny heard it.

Back to the skateboard. Well, you know what they say about such things? You always break something. In my case, I broke the skateboard and almost broke my ankle along with it! It could not be repaired but I still have and keep it today.

You see. It’s not the broken skateboard or vase that is the issue. It’s what the item really represents to you that is important. To me, it’s not a malfunctioning skateboard but an item of love from grandma to me. It just depends how bad you still want the vase. Of course, only you alone will truly know your vase’s weightage and appeal. Follow your heart and you will be happy. I need you to be.

Thou art enough

Yes, truly. Thou art enough for me.

"The hours I spend with you I look upon as sort of a perfumed garden, a dim twilight, and a fountain signing to it...you and you alone make me feel that I am alive...Other men, it is said, have seen angels, but I have seen thee and thou art enough."
--George Moore

Quotes of the Month

Maybe some of these can be the quotes of the month?

"Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies."
--Aristotle

"In dreams and in love there are no impossibilities."
--Janos Arnay

"My night has become a sunny dawn because of you."
--Ibn Abbad

"A kiss is a lovely trick, designed by nature, to stop words when speech becomes superfluous."
--Ingrid Bergmen

"Your words are my food, your breath my wine. You are everything to me."
--Sarah Bernhardt"

In my wildest dreams, you always play the hero. In my darkest hour of night, you rescue me, you save my life."
--Bliss and Cerney

"You're nothing short of my everything."
--Ralph Block

"What I do and what I dream include thee, as the wine must taste of its own grapes..."
--Elizabeth Barret Browning

"Like music on the waters is they sweet voice to me."
--Lord Byron

"I love you, not only for what you are, But for what I am when I am with you."
--Roy Croft

"Thou art to me a delicious torment."
--Ralph Waldo Emerson

"It's so easy, To think about Love, To Talk about Love, To wish for Love, But it's not always easy, To recognize Love, Even when we hold it.... In our hands."
--Jaka

"Two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one."
--John Keats

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart."
--Helen Keller

"In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing."
--Mignon McLaughlin

"Sometimes your nearness takes my breath away; and all the things I want to say can find no voice. Then, in silence, I can only hope my eyes will speak my heart."
--Robert Sexton

"My heart is ever at your service."
--William Shakespeare

"Within you I lose myself. Without you I find myself wanting to become lost again."
--Unknown

"If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you made me smile, I would have the whole night sky in the palm of my hand."
--Unknown

"If you love me only in my dreams, let me be asleep forever."
--Unknown

"Kiss me and you will see stars; love me and I will give them to you."
--Unknown

"The most eloquent silence; that of two mouths meeting in a kiss."
--Unknown

"Love doesn't make the world go round, love is what makes the ride worthwhile."
--Elizabeth Browning

"If I know what love is, it is because of you."
--Herman Hesse

"If I had a flower for every time I thought of you, I could walk in my garden forever."
--Alfred Lord Tennyson

“Tea Leaves” by Esmond Ng 12/05/05 © copyright

Wrote this for Joanna's friend. I can totally empathize with you as I've been through exactly the same issue 4 years ago. Take heart and pray. God's there. Here's my version of a deliberating encouragement.

“Tea Leaves” by Esmond Ng 12/05/05 © copyright
============================================

Away on slopes of different air,
Where ye painting on wall is really nature’s own;
Mountains line the pearly clouds,
That’s where my tea leaves grows’t.

The green that edges ye horizon,
The vast color of which serene grown;
Yet with each harvest that comes along,
Only the top leaves nonpareil.

Grey be by name my favorite tea,
Though woody and spicy it’s taste be;
Equivalent I say, it be Shiraz of tea,
But pleasure to palate it surely brings to Thee.

Like all good things Life which brings,
Thou needs really look beyond to see.
Appreciating the simple and ordinary,
Then and only pick the top few leaves.

Along midway sometimes grey it all seems,
Everything so looks going agains’t Thee.
Did I mention no rose beds amongs’t the leaves?
Hold on tight and God’s peace keep.

Even the best are cropp’d and trimm’d,
But like tea leaves they never cease;
Seasons, grows’t and flourishes once again.
So really, should Thee.

“The Twenty-Seven” by Esmond Ng 12/05/05 © copyright

For Bubu,

“The Twenty-Seven” by Esmond Ng 12/05/05 © copyright
==================================================

Though the hand of clouds shielded most brights from our sights,
Twenty Seven was more than enough for me.
The beautiful night not dimm’d for moment single,
For thee was by my side and right.

Lays’t down on fine sand we had be,
Everything truly was splendid as in dreamer’s plead.
Of all remember I, for it be most deeply engrav’d;
The momentous laze and too be it our first friendship embrace.

Often I would recall, thinks’t and relish;
Revel in all astonish’d honesty.
That it seem’d I’d known you for ages before,
Even though fate had decree’d chosen to so late.

In all instantaneous like combustion of passion flames,
I’d found, finally, with clear certitude.
That so Life without you,
Really feels like night skies not fill’d.

And maybe, just so now it darks’t that way;
I know deep down that because of Thee,
My twenty seven will always shine,
And my Life is brightly lit,
Because of you.

“I’m still me” by Esmond Ng 06/05/05 © copyright

For Bubu,

“I’m still me” by Esmond Ng 06/05/05 © copyright
==============================================

I know it seems different now,
A very chang’d circumstance we be in.
With every exchange liken’d to,
The decay of cold fatality wins.

For days, hours, seconds they creep by;
Exacerbate bad to its superlative.
Though I be thought of as repugnant,
Is that the really of me you knew?

Distrust and disbelief they set in,
Find my all so unnecessarily burden’d.
One day it be hard to see me;
The me who has always been.

For I am who you first chanc’d to meet,
I am the very same from the beginning.
Looks’t back and pray thee remember please,
Memory the same very old me.

童话

Another favourite song that's really close to my heart.

童话
=====
歌手:光良

忘了有多久
再没听到你
对我说你最爱的故事
我想了很久
我开始慌了
是不是我又做错了什么
你哭着对我说
童话里都是骗人的
我不可能是你的王子
也许你不会懂
从你说爱我以后
我的天空星星都亮了
我愿变成童话里
你爱的那个天使
张开双手变成翅膀守护你
你要相信
相信我们会像童话故事里
幸福和快乐是结局
一起写我们的结局

“Saga Seeds” by Esmond Ng © copyright 04/05/05

For Bubu,

“Saga Seeds” by Esmond Ng © copyright 04/05/05
===========================================

I thinks’t of thee from time to time,
Wonder if at times, I cross’d thy mind?
Even in dreams, thee appears.
Sometimes however good or bad,
Is still as sweet a dream can be.

Dreams be the only place I can see.
Now that live I unaccustom’d without thee;
Ye only place which sweet be to me.
Yes, I think back to places where we’d be.
Yes, they are such lip-lifting memories.

Like Saga Seeds which thinks’t of begone acts,
Something which we both can attest;
Relish of sentiments past and gone,
A trait that you wouldn’t not understand.

Thus pray I to thee, blame not be unto me.
For it is in genuine me,
To thinks’t and not forget thee.

“The Glass Globe Dream” by Esmond Ng © copyright 04/05/05

For Bubu,

“The Glass Globe Dream” by Esmond Ng © copyright 04/05/05
======================================================

As the world within the glass globe seems,
So pretty and everlasting be.
I wish the same of every Love story.
In one way within, perfection and fairytale achiev’d.

Precious Moments may some see it,
Forever memories others deem.
For others like me, looking in from the world outside;
It really be forlorn a journey.

Whether be me or another in glass globe dream,
Sincerely wish I the best for thee.
For really if I have Loved or so I’m convinc’d,
Then be happy is all I need from thee.

“Life goes on?” by Esmond Ng 04/05/05 © copyright

“Life goes on?” by Esmond Ng 04/05/05 © copyright
==============================================

Life goes on.
Although my heart stops beating,
And the twenty seven stars shine not.
Life goes on, it’s intriguing.

If indeed Life is of living,
Then mine is surely lie.
For what is One, where there is no meaning?
When every worth living has stopped shining.

I’ve tried, really have tried I.
It be not ease I assure thee.
For if case be, this I would not write.
But Life goes on.

I will survive and carry on.
Or say that just so cheat thyself.
For this juncture so seems
That Life does goes on without going on.

“I knew I Loved you before I met you” by Esmond Ng 04/05/05 © copyright

For Bubu,

“I knew I Loved you before I met you” by Esmond Ng 04/05/05 © copyright
====================================================================

Never understood why songs said of Loving before finding.
Till thy perfection grac’d my all so abysmal Life.
Realize’d then that songs may somewhat be speaking of you.

What really means the lyrics my interpretations be,
That I’ve Loved everything which you possess and represent.
Thus so it seems that all this search while, is really for you.

In that way, I‘ve actually Loved before finding.
Cherish’d before knowing, and found before finding.
For everything you are,
Is image of what I’ve long’d for past decade still.

Flipping by Esmond Ng 06/04/05 © copyright

For Bubu,

Flipping by Esmond Ng 06/04/05 © copyright
========================================
Remember the time your notebook took I from you?
Flipped to the end page and this which wrote;
Sweet a little message, sugary like you.
Of my purpose, penning thoughts so true.

Meaning the flipping to back I construed,
Signifies which back of my mind are you.
That with each day that is renewed,
The first thought, my smile begins with you.

Wrote I too that hopping each time could you,
Flip to the back and thinkst of me too.

(THERE'LL NEVER BE) ANOTHER YOU

Must have replayed this song a million times in office this morning. As usual, the sentimental Esmond started to tear again! This song really touches my heart. Can anyone else relate to this song?

(THERE'LL NEVER BE) ANOTHER YOU
===============================
Michael Damian 1991 - Album of "Dreams of Summer"

I have a life. I live a lie
It's more like living day to day
Just to get by
And it's OK cause I get through
But I know there'll never be another you.

I got my friends
They're always there
And someone special that I know who really cares
But late some nights
A voice cries through
Reminding me there'll never be another you.

I can recall all those winters and falls
Nights of love that I thought would be always with us
Writing our plans on the beach in the sand
But they faded through time in the wind and with you, ohh...

I think of you from time to time...
Sometimes I wonder if I ever cross your mind
But looking back is hard to do
Cause it reminds me there won't be another you, ohh...

If I could hold you again for one night
it would make my whole world come alive again, ohh...

I will survive and carry on
Once in awhile I hear an old familiar song
It takes me back and makes me blue
Reminding me there'll never be another you
Yes, I know there'll never be another you!

As You Like It (II)

From my favourite poet again. How true that truth be he speaks.

"We that are true lovers run into strange capers; but as all is mortal in nature, so is all nature in love mortal in folly."
--From As You Like It (II, iv, 53-56)

"All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players.
They have their exits and their entrances,
And one man in his time plays many parts,
His acts being seven ages."
--From As You Like It (II, vii, 139-143)

“You told me” by Esmond Ng 29/03/05 copyright ©

For Bubu,

“You told me” by Esmond Ng 29/03/05 copyright ©
=============================================

I’ve waited such a lonely time, yearning for nothing less,
of what past poets express’d with pens.
The plot beyond words, and story beyond thoughts,
oh how tough it was, the search.

But when my eyes met those windows of thee,
your very soul it pour’d to me.
A strange unexplainable feeling overwhelm’d it did,
the Holy One must have brought thee to me.

How we surpass’d writers of past, with no words we achiev’d more;
with no pens we wrote scores.
Music never as melodic, voices never so in one.
Thou need’d not say, I would the message.

Yes, you told me everything. Amazingly without anything saying.
Yet why need I explain, you told me already.

Life is Beautiful – 28/09/04 © copyright Esmond Ng

I wrote this last year to encourage a friend. Now, it seems this poem is really "easier said than done".

Life is Beautiful – 28/09/04 copyright © Esmond Ng
================================================

Life was never meant roses lining the way
Nor it be shelter from storms and winds strong
If it truly be of other case
Then never will thee see wars that cometh strife and pain’st

God, my father whom doeth incredible things
Not see do we his fathomed plans which play
Meant not what rain is to us, but is to trees on the plain
Sometimes really Fate not work our way

Cry you, “Please be like yesterday”
“Pray no”, I say to thee as no such thing
As rainbows grace the blue after the grey as you’d think’st
So too, look forward to the after where there is not yet pain

If Achievement came before Failure as in dictionaries’ say
Man would know never how success came
Memories honestly mean the past now sunk’st
Why bore over then relish the already won

Phyllis which is green bough to the Greeks
Signifies Life from you which brim
Never did leaves cease growing should they be trimm’d
Ask, why then should thee not flourish again.

Some kind of Love

The following were also in my friendster at one point. Found them really nice. Or rather, very heart-felt by me. Thought perhaps you'd like them too?


"Was just wondering if u still drop by occasionally?"
- Esmond 17/04/05

Love is that condition in which
The happiness of another person
Is essential to your own.
~ by Robert A. Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land ~

Love, you know, seeks to make happy rather than to be happy.
~ by Ralph Connor ~

I'd like to run away
From you,
But if you didn't come
And find me ...
I would die.
~ by Shirley Bassey ~

I have loved to the point of madness;
That which is called madness,
That which to me,
Is the only sensible way to love.
~ by F. Sagan ~

If I go away
What would still remain of me?
The ghost within your eyes?
The whisper in your sighs?
You see...Believe
And I'm always there.
~ by Jon Oliva ~

I sought for Love
But Love ran away from me.
I sought my Soul
But my Soul I couldn't see.
Then I sought You,
And I found all three.
~ by Unknown Author ~

The minute I heard my first love story,
I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was.
Lovers don't finally meet somewhere.
They're in each other all along.
~ by Maulana Jalalu'ddin Rumi ~

To love is to receive a glimpse of heaven.
~ by Karen Sunde ~

You may only be one person to the world
But you may also be the world to one person.
~ by Anonymous ~

True love cannot be found where it truly does not exist,
Nor can it be hidden where it truly does.
~ by Anonymous ~

To love a person is to learn the song
That is in their heart,
And to sing it to them
When they have forgotten.
~ by Anonymous ~

The only things in life you regret,
Are the risks that you didn't take.
~ by Anonymous ~

True love doesn't have a happy ending:
True love doesn't have an ending.
~ by Anonymous ~

You don't love a woman because she's beautiful,
She is beautiful because you love her.
~ by Anonymous ~

Love is not a matter of counting the years...
But making the years count.
~ by Michelle St. Amand ~

Just because someone doesn't love you
in the way you want them to,
doesn't mean that they don't love you
with all they've got.
~ by Author unknown ~

My Haircut

I wrote the following in my friendster one time. Don't think you saw it because I never received an invitation. :P


20/04/05
I once read this on my brothers blog:

A man walked in to the hairdressers to get his hair cut. After the cut he commented: Thats a very nice cut! He paid and left. Before leaving the barber said: Of course, Im a good barber. On his way out, the customer saw a dirty beggar by the street with long unkempt hair. He immediately turned back into the saloon and told the barber: You are not a good barber. If you were, the man outside would have his hair cut! The barber replied: Oh yes, Im a good barber. If the man comes to me, Id definitely have cut his hair. Similarly, its not that God does not exist. But rather, only people who dont go to Him.

I want to have my Hair-cut this Sunday. Sweetie, could you make arrangements for this weekend please? Thank you.

Who I want to meet? Gods grace and love for me.

“My Father who carryeth me” – by Esmond Ng 21/04/05 © copyright

For Bubu. Not sure why you deleted it though.

“My Father who carryeth me” – by Esmond Ng 21/04/05 © copyright
=========================================================

Dear Lord,

Oh how I’ve forsaken Thee.
For the last ten years, I thought Thee has too left me.
I do realize that answers may “No” sometimes be,
But never did I accept your decisions for me.
Oh how bad it was without Thee.
My life plagued like pagan Egypt,
How suffered I the ten years without ease,
Never felt ever that You be my peace.

Awakened this night all so suddenly,
Realized the pair of footprints be Thee that carryeth me.
Thank you for never letting go of this wayward sheep,
For everything, Thee has provided abundantly.
The two most important weeks to me you gave,
Of my life; others, most will never even glimpse.
I appreciate my Moulder and Father above,
Really Thee has been good to me.

Amen.

Thank you Lord for the trials that come my way. In Your time, Lord. In Your time.

I kept blaming God for all the disappointments in my Life. When ultimately, I’m actually the “disappointment”. Retrospectively, God has worked wonders in my life. What I’ve experienced for the two weeks, many will never even glimpse. Thank you, my Lord. I have indeed been fortunate. I trust you have plans for me.

In Your time, In Your time
You make all things beautiful in Your time.
Lord please show me everyday,
As You're teaching me Your ways,
That You'll do just what You say,
In your time.

“Dead without having dying” by Esmond Ng 04/04/05 copyright ©

Some of you have asked me what happened to this fairytale? Well, I really have no idea.

“Dead without having dying” by Esmond Ng 04/04/05 copyright ©
==========================================================
My heart beats, yet I’m not of the living.
I’ve breath but it be not air I breathe.
Tears soak which my face yet not I’m crying.
Then why so am I still living?

Everywhere the world moving,
why feel I my world has crashed in?
If a smile future be on my face,
would thou think it be called smiling?

If be true special one me,
why has thou forsaken thee?
A friend I have in Him?
Why too He has left me?

My poet favorite did, say of Love smooth not running,
never did I comprehend thee, that he be truth is speaking.
Living but yet not living;
Dead without having dying.